Monday, April 16, 2018

Craps and The Casino in Neverland

Dan and I play craps and hit the sports book annually for the Super Bowl. Craps is a great game to play because:

1. The odds are almost 50/50 if you play it right (or close enough)
2. Everyone on the table can have a lot of fun when the dice get hot
3. You can drink for free (usually) as long as you are playing, so if you are breaking even, you are essentially making money

A couple of years ago I moved out to Portland and they opened an Indian casino recently called Ilani about 25 minutes north of the city (when there isn't traffic). It is a large casino with many restaurants, lots of slots machines, and many table games. So I headed out there to try it out, and signed up for a "rewards card" which lets you earn comps as you play (you hand it to the dealer when you buy in your chips). Along with my rewards card I gave them my address and email so now I am on their mailing list for a regular stream of deals.



I laughed very hard when I received this mailed offer of what is a craps table apparently in neverland. There are so many things wrong with this picture that I can only start to point them out.

1. There are fit and good looking folks at the craps table. Ha ha if you have one normal looking person you are doing fine... to have 3 pretty girls and 2 normal looking guys is unheard of
2. The women appear to be drinking wine, martinis and champaign. I may have seen wine out of a tumbler glass but even that's rare... never seen the other ones especially not in formal glasses
3. THE BETS ARE SO WRONG! LET ME COUNT THE WAYS...
- the first guy on the left has one $5 chip on the pass line and about ten $5 chips as "odds" behind it. I know for a fact that maximum odds at that casino are 5x odds (they are 3-4-5 for the degenerates out there)
- the woman right of the guy about to roll the dice is playing the "pass line" and the "don't pass line" AT THE SAME TIME. THIS HAS LIKELY NEVER HAPPENED IN THE HISTORY OF CRAPS
- someone is betting the "don't come" line. Never seen that bet, but at least it is possible
- It is hard to count the cips and possible that there are some "big" denominations under the stacks but the pass line vs odds make no sense at all

We'll go back to that casino and I can point this out to management and I'm sure they'll be like GTFO but it will at least get a laugh on my part.

2 comments:

Dan from Madison said...

Among the eleventy things wrong with this picture is the most obvious one, the model on the left leaning out WAY over the table with that martini glass. The dealers/boss would never allow that.

Dan from Madison said...

Also someone has a bet on the ten but it is "off". Why? The only time I have ever seen those "off" is on a come out roll, which this obviously isn't.