Most of the article is laughingly dumb, but here is the part that stuck out to me:
For starters, the Big Ten has made it clear that candidates must be part of the Association of American Universities to gain consideration. The only Illinois schools in the AAU right now are Illinois-Champaign, Northwestern and the University of Chicago, a founding member of the Big Ten that stopped competing in the league in 1939.This struck me as odd, so I took the liberty to launch a full out investigation that took approximately five seconds of my time (google) and found this page, that lists the current AAU members. Among them are:
That is 13 schools. Anyone missing? Beuller? Beuller?
Well, I will give you the answer. NEBRASKA. That's right, Nebraska is not an AAU member. So next time you hear the Big Ten getting all high and mighty about not wanting anymore teams that are not AAU members, lets just put an asterisk there and make a footnote that says "unless they bring a ton of ca$h to the conference". Of course ESPN would never say something like this for fear of losing access, but I guess that is my job.