My Hobby Job

First, one of my favorite workin’ man tunes just to add a little bit of atmosphere to this story. Lyrics here.

  

In 2005 after 32 years of uninterrupted gainful employment my full time career ended. I like to say it was due to “creative differences”. In other words, I was creative and they were different (that in itself is worth another long story). Through no fault of my own they released me after 18 straight years with the same company for two reasons. 1) I was too old and 2) I made too much money. It was expected and no surprise to me even though I was awarded their manager of the year award along with a large bonus in 2001.

After 32 years in my chosen field I saw first hand what happened to those over 50 years-old and was well prepared for it. Management always seemed like an unnatural act to me anyway so I always stayed hands-on by executing and contributing graphic design, keeping current with technology and understanding my business inside out. It allowed me to prevail for a few more years as an independent contractor, a lone gun for hire if you will.

The plan was to pay the bills until 2014 when our annuities and social security kick in. This will provide a respectable combined income for our retirement. We have no debt other than our mortgage (to be paid off in 2016). We also have a fine nest egg with bonds and securities as a cushion so what’s not to like?

What’s not to like is the boredom.

Each year for the past six my freelance business had grown to where it seemed as if this was something I should have done years sooner. I was earning a comfortable income, almost as much as full-time and working only 7-9 months per year. There was more time to do a few things there was no time for in the past such as DIY home improvement and maintenance. There was also more time to fish, hunt and enjoy other leisurely activities.

Last year there was a noticeable drop-off in work calls due to the economy. This year has been a lot worse. The overall business is dead and ad agencies have gone through a lot of downsizing. There are now a lot of very talented journeymen on the street. Other independents I am friends with who are younger than me were hurting to the point they had left the business entirely because there was very little work to be had due to this ongoing stagnant Obungle economy. They had bills to pay and children to send to college so they found employment wherever they could. My offspring are now on their own so we qualify as empty-nesters with virtually no debt. Not a bad place to be these days if I must say so.

This year has been very different. With little paying work for me to speak of I have been bored sh!tless.

Full retirement is not all it seemed to be, for me at least, not now. I need something to do since I can’t go fish or hunt every other day. I need interaction with others, folks to talk to and partner with, something to look forward to each day other than wake up, read the news and drink coffee on the screen porch before mowing the lawn, tending the garden and pruning rose bushes. And I simply hate to golf.

Start traveling? Hell, there is a big world out there but traveling for a vacation is something that doesn’t interest me for more than a week or so per year. It’s way too much hassle and something that wouldn’t be special if I did it a lot. I simply despise airports, delayed flights and that homeland security wait-and-grope. To me it’s just awful having to sleep in germ-infested public hotel beds on germ-infested carpeting, packing and unpacking, rent-a-cars and...well...you get the picture. It's just not my thing.

I always told my young ‘uns (when they would ask) to follow a career path in an area you like, that way you will never hate your job even if it doesn’t earn you great wealth. In return you will be happy. Make opportunities happen and make them work in your favor and work hard at it. It worked like a charm for me. I had a fabulous career that took me to many exotic places and allowed me to meet the most interesting and fascinating people, some very famous. My career took me beyond my wildest youthful ambitions. No regrets here. None.

So what did I decide to do? I did what I always preached. I got a job doing something I like but doesn't pay too well. This one is so different. It’s a hobby job. In other words I don’t need this job, I want to be there. Until the end of the year I am now working part time at a large outdoor outfitting retailer (that shall remain nameless on the blog for obvious reasons) in the hunting, archery and firearm department.

Having this job allows me to still work at graphic design from the home office only (which was about 35% of my business) should the opportunity come my way. No here and there on-site two to four day agency assignments at snarky new-age ad agencies that aren’t really worth my time or effort. Sounds good to me.

It’s been two weeks now. My new employer put me through a one-week orientation learning about the company, the products, their retail process and everything they are required to tell me in order to avoid potential litigation. I had to sign enough documents to drain a ball point pen. Damn, I just love corporate attorneys and H.R. types. They think of everything to cover a unique company such as this.

Since fishing and hunting are my favorite pastimes this isn’t like work at all. It’s a fun learning experience about products I use and enjoy. There is a lot for me to learn too. Just because I have been hunting and fishing my entire life doesn’t mean I know it all, far from it. And then there are the people, both the other employees and especially some very interesting customers to interact with.

Nearly everyone who works or shops there either hunts and/or goes fishing and/or goes camping. There is a bond. Most are more than willing to share stories and knowledge. Most customers come in and know exactly what they want and look to us for affirmation to confirm their specific choices. “What do you think”, some will ask. If I don’t know I radio someone who does. It’s expected and encouraged. This is a highly specialized retailer that offers unique niche products and they are very, very successful at it.

Not many retailers are doing well these days. So check this out. 

Firearms are also my friends. But there are many more of them I still want to meet and get to know. They’re all here and so are some real experts. The man who manages the Gun Library has incredible knowledge and so do the experienced veterans who work the gun counter.

Another hunting associate (they call us outfitters) is promising to show me how to reload my own ammo. With my employee discount it should make my shooting much more affordable and more frequent, using either reloads or factory. Since I have trained gun dogs they have asked me to be the go-to guy for remote collars and related dog training equipment. Bring it on.

This isn’t work. Not to me. Really, it isn’t.

Monday Morning Blues

Saturday Night Sixties

It’s Saturday night again. Time to relax and set the wayback machine for the 60’s, my favorite decade.

Hmm...Will It Become The Big Eleven Again?

No news about the Penn State football program has been published on the Big 10, 11, 12 website today.


But I did find this.

"The Joe Paterno statue was removed Sunday morning from its pedestal outside Beaver Stadium, and it will be stored in an unnamed "secure location," Penn State president Rodney Erickson announced.

Erickson also said the Paterno name will remain on the university's library."

However, Penn State President Rodney Erickson never mentioned if the

Beaver Stadium men's shower room name will remain

"The Coach Sandusky Romper Room".

Monday Morning Blues

We're Barely Capitalists

It is not remarked generally in the popular press but, in many instances, the West is barely capitalist. Let's just look at the simplest definition of capitalism, per Wikipedia:

Capitalism is an economic system that is based on private ownership of the means of production and the creation of goods or services for profit.

How many of the businesses and services that you encounter on a daily basis meet that test? Very few, I'd bet.

Here's some hardworking guys that load beer out of a truck. Oh wait - that's Wirtz, and they are part of what is basically a beer cartel, an Illinois Liquor Distributor. This Chicago Reader article (while a few years old, still basically relevant) calls it out:

Many say the three-tier system has made distributors a protected class, but distributors maintain that liquor requires special rules to this day... California State University economics professor Glen Whitman, who has conducted a study on the economic logic of the system, pooh-poohs this rationale. "The arguments are in no way specific to alcohol," he says. "Why aren't we concerned about people producing counterfeit Coca-Cola? We have sales taxes on all kinds of goods, but we don't feel the need to create a third party for them."

If you are in the media business, your license or spectrum is effectively negotiated with the government. If you are in the health care business, you are tied to a byzantine public / private system deeply enmeshed with the use of government dollars. Energy / electricity / gas is tied to various monopoly service laws, and permitting pushes out many of the smaller entities ("fracking" is one of the rare efforts to escape their grasp, mainly because it came up spontaneously and off the radar). Agriculture is tied to price supports, and many service industries (such as law) use "guild" power to limit new members and entrants, regardless of quality of work claims. Of course schools, universities, police and fire departments, etc... are completely government controlled entities.

So what's left? Well you have small scale retail, and restaurants. While they have a bit of government oversight, the government probably plays a smaller role than in most industries.

I read a recent article about Greece where a visitor actually had hope for the country because, for the first time, people no longer queue for government jobs since the government is no longer hiring, and they need to go to work for themselves. Not only do they need to work for themselves, they need to have a product that they can sell outside Greece because their fellow countrymen have few Euros left to buy anything.

A recent article I wrote about the power situation in the UK was distressing because the government was effectively moving to virtually a "central planning" model for energy, and this is a Tory (right wing) government. Without a second thought they disregarded the fact that the private sector generally does better than a government imposed model, whether it is done by command or by fiat by limiting permitting and creating bogus incentives on items such as wind power which collapse as soon as the gravy train expires.

It is definitely a scary thought experiment to think about the "free market" as you walk around a city such as Chicago, and how little of it exists, and how what's left is dominated by crony capitalism, cartels, and political favoritism.

Cross posted at Chicago Boyz

Iconic March of "Crappy Beer"

One of the most famous visual diagrams in history was made by Tuftle and it uses lines of various sizes to show Napoleon's march into Russia in 1812 and the line gets thinner and thinner as he retreats back into France.

This diagram is the crappy beer equivalent (from the Chicago Tribune, an excellent piece of art, they deserve credit) - the ravenous march of lousy brews as they take over the world. One time I talked to a manager of a pretty upscale liquor store and he said that they sold more pallets of Miller Lite than all the craft brews put together on a given day.

It is analogous to a Chuck Klosterman article I remember reading about hipster bands a long time ago (too lazy to look it up) where he chuckled about the ardent points of view on obscure bands like Yo La Tengo (famously mocked by the Onion where a collapse at a Yo La Tengo concert kills 16 record store clerks) when to the general population they are absolutely irrelevant, and any of the country singers dwarf them in popularity by any measure.

Saturday Night Sixties

It’s Saturday night again. Time to relax and set the wayback machine for the 60’s, my favorite decade.

DroughtBuster

A long lasting downpour arrived late Wednesday. In total there was 2.21" of much needed wetness according to my hi-tek digital wireless rain gauge.

No more setting out sprinklers. Even here in the woods when it gets this dry there's a lot of stress on all plants, trees and shrubs. The last time we had a drought I ignored it and everything growing on the property was stressed out even the following year. We lost some shrubs and the lawn looked like crap.

Looks like the farm got good and wet as well according to the radar. It is located in a narrow stretch of Newton County IN that has gotten just enough rain so the corn could go to silk. Fingers crossed the corn and beans should be doing better than on most Indiana farms and with the prices per bushel so high the crops should fetch enough profit to make up for last year's blight.

Fingers crossed.

When It's This Hot...

...just think cool

I Always Feel Like...

...somebody's watching me

Monday Morning Blues

Special thanks to Gerry for filling in for me with the MMB while I was across the pond doing my deal.

Mis-pricing Risk

Mis-pricing Risk in the US Real Estate and Lending Markets

Back before the housing bust in the early 2000's we were in the process of purchasing a new condo and wanted to put down a substantial amount of money, over 50% of the purchase price. The response from lenders at the time was a full cavity search of all assets we had across all dimensions, and we never could seem to satisfy them (i.e. after we had given them everything, there were even more questions).

Meanwhile, people were getting "liar loans" with virtually nothing down or "balloon loans" with floating interest rates that were extremely risky, and they were paying roughly the same interest rate that we were receiving, even though the bank stood almost no risk of default with us since we were willing to put down 50% as equity. In order to lose money, the price of our real estate would have to lose 50% before the bank was at risk at all.

How this SHOULD have been accomplished is that someone borrowing money and putting down very little equity would have to pay a substantially higher interest rate than someone putting down substantial amounts of equity, since the real risk to the bank was far lower. Instead, the lender went through a spurious cavity search of me and then let the other guy do a liar-loan at virtually the same rates.

Today, this problem has been "fixed" in a different way - instead of varying the interest rate based upon the inherent risk of the project, people with good credit receive loans at very low interest rates and people with poor credit are effectively frozen out of the market entirely. They have no access to credit at all, in the first place. We have de-facto rebuilt redlining, albeit based on creditworthiness, with no "slope" for those with poorer credit. This same process works with businesses - banks are willing to lend to those types of businesses that essentially don't need the money (strong cash flows, limited debt) and won't even consider riskier companies and start ups, at any price.

Mis-Pricing Emerging Country Debt Risk:

Today the world is hungry for "yield" or interest / dividend income, a consequence of the "zero rate interest policy" or ZIRP that is effectively employed in most of the developed economies today.

Mexico is currently able to issue debt at a rate of 5.43%. The Mexican finance officials see that there is a hunger for their debt and are moving to respond to it by issuing 10 and 20 year debt.

Several analysts saw the increase in long-term bond issuance as a response to the recent strong demand for the paper, which has pushed secondary-market yields down sharply in the past month.

While Mexico has financially been running a sound ship, with a reasonable deficit, there are profound risks in buying ten and twenty year debt at under 6%. The first major risk is the Mexican currency, which has depreciated many times in the past. The second major risk is crime.

A recent (highly recommended, albeit terrifying) article called "The Kingpins" in the New Yorker describes the intense drug wars currently engulfing Mexico, which lays out the following facts:

1) over 50,000 soldiers have deserted the army while fighting the drug war 2) it only costs 1000 pesos ($80 USD) to have someone assassinated in Mexico 3) over 98% of violent crime goes unpunished 4) drug lords are now tapping right into the pipelines of PEMEX, the oil monopoly and cash cow for the government, in order to steal fuel

The article follows the drug gang battles between various factions, the powerlessness and corrupt nature of the governmental bodies, and the civilians caught in the cross fire. These drug battles are so epic that they would better be described as military campaigns, and the entire situation is close to that of a civil war. Other than the use of massive heavy weapons (tanks, artillery) and targeting by ethic group (rather than gang alliances), the situation is likely not far from the Syria civil war in terms of total casualties and deaths.

HOW does it make sense to buy 20 year Mexican debt at a rate near 6%? To the extent that you believe the Mexican currency will do better than your currency and want to earn 6% during the interim, I guess that makes sense. But in general I cannot see that 6% interest rates in a country engulfed in a virtual civil war with widespread lawlessness and epic corruption making sense as fairly pricing that risk.

Cross posted at Chicago Boyz

Shut Up and Play the Hits - One Day Only (July 18)

The band LCD Soundsystem, led by James Murphy, recently broke up. They are releasing a DVD of their final live shows along with a release in theaters FOR ONE DAY ONLY ON Wednesday, July 18. Look for "Shut Up and Play the Hits" near you and I recommend going. Here is a web site with the trailer and a list of theaters.

I saw LCD Soundsystem three times - they are (were?) one of my favorite bands. The first time was at Lollapalooza in 2007 - they played right before the headliner, who was Daft Punk (in their amazing triangle light show) and after LCD's set was done James Murphy just pointed over to the Daft Punk stage and said go. "Daft Punk Is Playing At My House" (celebrating the release of their album with a big party) was one of LCD Soundsystem's big hits off their first record, so it was a great coincidence that they were playing back to back on nearby stages. I remember how hard their drummer worked the entire show and that he was up front (often drummers are in the back) - I thought he might pass out in the heat.

The second time I saw LCD Soundsystem was at Pitchfork in Union Park in Chicago in 2010. It was a blazing hot day and I just came out to see LCD Soundsystem at the end. They played a great set and I walked back to River North along Grand Avenue. At one point a CTA bus slowed down and asked me if I needed a ride, which is code for "you are in the wrong neighborhood" because CTA buses don't generally slow down for anything except assigned stops, so I got a cab after that.

The third time I saw LCD Soundsystem was at the Aragon Ballroom in late 2010. It was a great show with a happy vibe and the entire crowd was surging. Their last song before their encore was "Yeah" and they built it up instrument by instrument and then each musician walked off the stage one at a time until you just had feedback. It seems strange that a song like "Yeah" could be so good live but maybe you just had to be there. My photos didn't turn out (I was too paranoid that they'd confiscate everything to bring my good camera, which was a mistake) but at least I have the memories.

I recommend that you go and see the movie, and if you can't, pick up the DVD (even though I haven't seen it, I know the songs). And good for LCD Soundsystem to try to go out with a bang.

If you are interested in checking out LCD Soundsystem here are a few songs you can download over at iTunes if you want to spend $1.29 / song
1) and 2) "All My Friends" and "Losing My Edge" both listed in the "Top 20 tracks of the 2000's" per Pitchfork read about them here
3) "Daft Punk Is Playing at My House" - a great beat and funny song proclaiming their love for Daft Punk
4) "Yeah (Crass Version") - their live closer that takes a while to get to know
5) "Drunk Girls" - funny and off their last album

Cross posted at Chicago Boyz

Saturday Night Sixties

It’s Saturday night again. Time to relax and set the wayback machine for the 60’s, my favorite decade.

You Can't Predict This White Sox Season

This White Sox season has got to be one of the most "out-of-the-sky" events in recent Chicago sports history. Before the season the Sox were pretty much left for dead by prognosticators, since here were their main moves:

- lose Buehrle, likely your best single pitcher over the last 50 years, to free agency and get nothing in return
- get rid of your closer, don't get a new one
- bet on Dunn and Rios, who were "epic fails" in 2011, to rebound. In fact Dunn's miserable performance in 2011 was so bad I stopped going to the games because he was just killing us
- get rid of Carlos Quentin, who at least had pop in his bat, when he wasn't hurt
- continue to bet on Paulie, who is at the tail end of his career when usually numbers start to decline
- just bet on a whole crop of rookies to fill in all the gaps in the field, pitching, and everywhere else

And one move that was a bit of a head scratcher for baseball, hiring Robin Ventura, who was out of baseball, as manager.

Anything was better than Guillen... the one move I whole-heartedly support (firing his whiny, insane, motor-mouth ass).

On to the 2012 season, which was summed up by this incredible game summary for the 14 inning victory last night (I stayed up until the 12th inning before I conked out, sorry):

The Sox used nine pitchers for the second time this season - of which eight were rookies... It almost seemed fitting that the Sox scored their winning run on a 14-pitch at-bat by Kevin Youkilis, who hit a sacrifice fly off Everett Teaford to score Beckham.

The fact that the White Sox were able to successfully rely on EIGHT rookie pitchers to get the victory is probably the most amazing statistic that I have seen in years. Along with that is the deal where the Sox picked up Youk (which Gerry celebrated here) for an absolute steal (we gave up that little guy Lillibridge and a minor league pitcher). Note how in that summary above Youk took that pitcher from Kansas City on a 14 pitch at bat, just like the "Greek God of Walks" is supposed to do. And it plum wore that pitcher out in the wee hours.

Oh and while we are pointing out the completely unexpected, there's more. You have a sore-armed reliever - Sale - what do you do with him? Take him out of the bullpen, make him the starter, and see him contend for the AL Cy Young Award, and be a potential starter for the All-Star game. And although individual achievements aren't as important as the fact that the team is in first place, you can't forget Humber's PERFECT GAME, of which he may be baseball's most obscure pitcher ever to do that.

I didn't get a picture of last nights' game but here is a good one of Paulie from a Sox / Cubs game back in 2007 when I had seats right in front of the White Sox bullpen and could watch them warm up that close. Say what you will about Wrigley but that is a great place to watch the ballgame.

I had over 40 games for last years' debacle of a season and wasn't going to buy ANY this year (due to Dunn) but I broke down and bought a 14 game package. The seats were great, all in the 100 section (not bleachers), in a variety of areas. For that game 4th of July weekend I was in the 12th row! Hopefully the Sox start to fill the park and build up a bigger season ticket base for 2013.

Urban Garden

Below is a cool view of an urban garden in the new east side. The Aon building (formerly Standard Oil) is on the left and the Aqua on the right.

The clouds look interesting.

Cross posted at Chicago Boyz

Ask Me If I Care

Yesterday there were reports about outfits designed by Ralph Lauren to be worn for the upcoming summer Olympic opening ceremony. Someone paid attention and discovered the outfits were made in China. What isn’t anymore? Now it’s all over the media.

One wag described these outfits as Thurston Howell lll meets Che Guevara. Made me laugh.

 

To me they appear to have just jumped off an old wooden two-masted sloop in HighAnusPort MA…or Fire Island.

Seriously, aren’t the Olympics nothing more than a tired old event that lost interest when the cold war ended? I mean, Olympic games were the only head to head competition against the eastern block countries and that evil Soviet Empire so it generated some ersatz nationalistic pride, to a point.


Now the Olympics are nothing more than a boring miss-mash of head-to-head competition between nobodies and a way for others to make a buck from apparel, buttons and shameless corporate marketing promotions. 

In high school I ran track specializing in 60 yd. indoor and 120 yd. outdoor high and low hurdles. On occasion the coach made me run 220, 440 and 880 relays in meets where I still had to run hurdles. I hated those. They were balls out sprints. I did it all to stay in shape and hang around the gym.

Track and field events generally drew no spectators besides a few parents. Maybe. The same goes for swimming and diving, wrestling and archery. Wait, archery wasn’t a high school sport when I attended school and doubt if it is today. Track and field events just suck to watch but were fun to participate in.

Boring, boring and boring, especially basketball where pampered NBA all-stars make up Team USA. Wake me up when it’s all over.

The White Sox start the second half of the season tonight with a 3-game lead going into a series with Kansas City.

Screw the Olympics. Let’s play ball.

The Album That Saved Metal From Itself

Carl has mentioned that he is a metal genius before, but so am I.

We both have been listening to the genre since high school and are pretty much the same age, having met at the dorms at good 'ol U of I (hey, at least we aren't Penn State).

Metal has taken various forms over the years, with punk and other things like that rolled into the mix.  Is Husker Du metal?  Someone should write their masters thesis on important questions like these (if they haven't already).

But back to the dorms.  It is a Saturday night in the late eighties, around 10pm.  Our RA has earlier in the evening supplied us with enough booze to kill an army and we are consuming it in rapid fashion.  What comes on at 10pm?  Well, Headbangers Ball, of course.  I watch it every time in an alcohol fueled haze.
 Yep, that is what metal had become.  Adam Curry, who was probably minutes ago introducing Tears for Fears videos, just fluffs up the hair (more), slaps on a t shirt and leather jacket and goes into the Headbangers Ball.

The music was sucking out loud too.  I have to admit I did enjoy for a bit some of the Poison, Britney Fox and other nonsense that was coming out.  However.

Have you ever been to a party and it is getting late?  Like too late?  Like only bad things are going to happen late?  That is what metal was in the late eighties.  It was the party that really needed to end, but someone called the liquor store and found out that there was one keg of Old Style left.  And we were, by god, going to go get it even though we were all wasted and it was 1am.

Then someone said NO MORE.  The party is over.  That someone was the album that saved metal from itself.  And Justice For All, by Mettalica.

I remember when I heard the first notes coming from the record player down the hall.  I said to myself "what the f*ck is that?" and ran down there for a listen.

The rest, as they say, is history.  That single album pretty much shoved the hair bands and bullcrap singers out the door, and ushered in the grunge movement.  Even today, many metal songs sound like or take riffs from And Justice For All.  But not many bands can put together a complete album anymore like that (even Mettalica).

Cool Theater... And Rock of Ages

I recently saw the movie "Rock of Ages". First - about the theater. I was at a small theater in a rural area in Pennsylvania and it was the best movie experience that I've had in years. You got an assigned seat and the seat was an enormous recliner with a cupholder, and it folded out like a La-z-Boy for your feet. With an assigned seat theoretically you could show up right before the movie started and you'd know that you had a seat. The gap between our row and the row in front of us must have been 6 feet, which meant you didn't have to squeeze past anyone if you had to leave your seat (even with the feet out). The theater didn't have the sound blasting, either, and the previews were mercifully short (I am usually drained after 1/2 an hour of idiotic commercials and previews at deafening volumes, because my attention span is minuscule). The final bonus was that the cost was about $7, likely because it was the matinee and it was an out-of-the-way location, but try going to a movie in the city, it is often almost 2x that price.

On to the movie... there was a review in the New Yorker magazine (June 25 issue)that summed it up well:

Why, as a patron of "rock of Ages", do I wish I had taken the precaution of entering the theater drunk?"

The movie is supposedly set in the late 1980's, the era of "Hair Metal". It is based on a musical that was a hit on Broadway, apparently (I know next to nothing about theater and musicals). However, I am a certified expert on hair metal and the music of that era.

As a guy - there are two reasons to watch this movie for certain - go here and here because we don't want the traffic.

The movie is supposed to be set in 1987 but the music was a mismash of non-metal. From my perspective there were only a few songs that were relevant to the theme - that would be the Twisted Sister songs (I Wanna Rock, We're Not Gonna Take it), the awful Poison songs (Nothin But A Good Time, Every Rose Has It's Thorn), Bon Jovi (Wanted Dead or Alive), Def Leppard (Pour Some Sugar on Me)and Whitesnake (Here I Go Again).

There were a bunch of awful songs or irrelevant songs included, including the staggeringly bad "We Built This City" and "Don't Stop Believing" which isn't even a distant cousin or near-earth object of hair metal. The story became the tale of redemption through music and metal, while simultaneously stripping hair metal of EVERYTHING THAT IT WAS ABOUT, which was sleaze, drugs, boozing, and living off your str*pper girlfriend.

As someone who lived through that era a "real" Rock of Ages would have had the apex of Hair Metal and then the slashing punch of death in the form of Guns N' Roses (which in some sense was the top of hair metal, although they didn't joke around) and then grunge and Metallica who released "And Justice for All", or as Dan and I would call it - the album that saved metal.

To end Rock of Ages with the simpering ballad "Don't Stop Believing" was just the worst and crappiest cop out to what could have been a movie about the top of hair metal and what came next. But likely the "Glee" fans wouldn't have wanted to see the debauchery that it really was and how it morphed into metal and grunge so that's all stripped out.

For the first time I did get a little bit of the power of the musical. I knew all the songs and paid attention the whole time through, even if a lot of it was cringing.

Dogs Around Town

Around River North I frequently see this rather petite woman walking these two giant dogs. A female relative of mine hurt her arm when a big dog pulled on the leash while she was walking it; these dogs could obviously take her for quite a ride if they were ill trained. They appear to be well trained - she must know what she is doing at least according to the "Dog Whisperer" she is walking in front of her dogs (everyone else I see in the city walks behind their dog).

While shooting at Gerry's farm this dog apparently had some sort of death wish... he continually walked in front of the firing line, no matter what we were firing (even Gerry's powder gun which packed a big wallop). We had to shout "dog" while people were shooting so they could wait for the dog to lope right past the targets before restarting, kind of like how you shouted "car" when you were younger while playing ball in the street. This went on for over a half hour.

Cross posted at Chicago Boyz

I Always Feel Like...

...somebody's watching me...

Damn Blogger...

We don't complain about blogger, our free blogging program courtesy of Google, but sometimes it is exasperating.

Here is the blog in Firefox, Chrome, and Safari.

Here is the blog in Internet Explorer. The right column with labels and links doesn't appear... it is at the very end (below all the posts). I tried tweaking the settings a million ways and I still can't fix it. The last and final option is to "remove customizations" on the template which probably will make it work under IE but I am going to let Dan do that if he wants to and can't figure it out.

As of now 34% of our visitors are using Internet Explorer, and the rest are using something else. Sorry if you see a big blank on the right side for now...

Why MLB Still Has Me

I know, I know. In baseball the hitters were juiced, bats are corked and in some years the balls are wound too tight.

Is there any sport where participants don’t cheat? In the NFL there is eavesdropping and HGH. In the NBA and Boxing the events get rigged. NCAA college sport is loaded with thuggish, boorish criminals who get paid on the side, and that doesn’t even count the Paterno and Sandusky types. Even the Tour De France has rampant doping going on. Cheating is everywhere in sport. To me, baseball is still an entertaining and elegant sport to watch that is rich in tradition.

My love for baseball goes back to my younger days in the 60’s and 70’s. During summer break we played baseball each and every day. Baseball is a game any kid can play in team-oriented competition.

Playing baseball didn’t cost much. Unlike today where all kids are cursed with Nickelodeon, Sponge Bob Gay Pants, video games and their personal ‘devices’, we spent our free time outdoors playing sports or riding bikes. Kids today are too busy texting sh!t about Beber. I feel sorry for the youth of today, I truly do. They don’t know what fun is and whatever fun they now choose usually costs their parents a lot of money.

For us each day would begin with a game played with a whiffleball in our backyard where we had a fence to swing for. My parents didn’t seem to mind the well-worn base paths in the lawn. Later in the day a few times a week there were the little league games. I wasn’t a very good player overall because I couldn’t hit worth a sh!t. But I loved playing the field where I excelled.

Turning a double play playing short or second (my favorite position) was a big thrill but my most satisfying contributions were chasing those fly balls most others couldn’t catch since, if anything, I was fast. I knew which players were big hitters and most of them couldn’t help pulling the ball down the foul line. I could park my ass on the foul line guaranteeing to get an out on the better hitters. Coaches loved that.

Our backyard teams were made up of neighborhood boys and on occasion some girls of all ages. It was friendly. One summer this tiny young kid no older than six or seven showed up in the back yard with a bat and glove hanging on his handlebars. We let him play because it was only a whiffle ball. He was surprisingly good and so very young. His older sister played at times too as I recall, they were both new to the neighborhood. This kid was never seen without a ball, glove and bat hanging on his handlebars riding his bike around the area.

If we played a game at the local park using a hard ball he would find us. We let him play but threw slow pitch to him. He was more of a mascot for us and we got a kick out of him.

The kid’s name was Hal Morris. This Hal Morris

Years later the Bro told me Hal was playing pro for Cincinnatti. And we knew him way back when he was about six years old.

My grandfather always managed to take us to at least one White Sox game per year. It was always when the Yankees were in town. We got to see Yogi Berra, Mickey Mantle, Roger Maris, Tom Tresh, Whitey Ford and local favorite, bad boy Jim Bouton, who played high school ball at Bloom in Chicago Heights. I loved reading his tell-all book, Ball Four.

One day after entering Comiskey Park (we always got there early enough to watch batting practice) Papa led me over to a gentleman who was talking to another. He introduced himself and me as his grandson. I shook hands with the man but had no idea who he was. Turns out it was Mel Allen, long time Yankees announcer and voice of the televised “This Week In Baseball”.

Old Comiskey was a special place for me. The combined smell of stale beer, popcorn and cigar smoke is one never to be forgotten. Back then there was even the occasional old timer wearing a straw hat, white shirt and suspenders smoking a fat stogie. Walking up from the dank corridor to see the bright green expanse of a well manicured grass field and the huge exploding scoreboard always gave me the chills.

As time went by I always remained a White Sox fan. It had a lot to do with being a far (Indiana) south sider. My entire family, uncles, cousins, etc. were all Sox fans. The Cubs may as well have been the Milwaukee Cubs. They were foreigners.

It always bothered me to meet a local who happened to be a Yankee or Dodger or even a Green Bay Packer fan. These types only want to be associated with a winner and have no local loyalty. These are posers, not fans.

With the exception of 1959 the Sox usually sucked. It didn’t matter. The Cubs sucked more. I was a born Sox fan through and through knowing that some day they would surprise everyone and they finally did. The 2005 White Sox World Series Championship was as rewarding to me as Chicago Bears Super Bowl XX victory (sorry Carl and Dan).

Tuesday I will be watching the MLB All-Star game. I always have watched it until the 80’s. It seems that on that day I always had to work downtown late into the night. The career came first but it always pissed me off because the word to work late always came at 4:30 pm. that day.

The MLB All-Star game is unlike any other. Unlike The NBA and NFL, baseball is such a casually paced non-contact game most of the stars show up without fear of being injured and at least they seem to play to win. And now they have a reason to win. I like that rule change. It sure helped us out in 2005.

But - I refuse to watch tonight’s Home Run Derby nonsense. Mainly because of that east-coast media slut Chris Berman, who I believe is a curse on all of professional sports. When that clown appears on the Eastern Seaboard Programming Network I immediately tune out.

Hearing Chris Bore-man gravel out another “backbackbackbackback” on every hit would make me throw a slipper at the TV.  STFU already.    . 

Monday Morning Blues

Around Chicago July 2012

Upper left - we have been having some crazy storms here in Chicago along with the heat. This red art sculpture was knocked down by the micro-burst last weekend as I drove through the rain. Upper right - I remember in my marketing class that you could sell on "price" or "quality". This car dealer is clearly going with the "price" approach. Middle left - two girls on a scooter on the Eisenhower in heavy traffic is a bad idea. Middle center - the beautiful Nissan GTR supercar valet parked in front of a hip restaurant in River North. Middle right - are we in Russia? $5 Vodka? Lower left - a monster Red Bull truck dwarfs traffic in a spot on Wacker Drive. Lower right - the Protein Bar, a place where non-obese Chicago citizens (there are a few of them) tend to congregate and eat healthy food. Highly recommended.

Cross posted at Chicago Boyz

Saturday Night Sixties

It’s Saturday night again. Time to relax and set the wayback machine for the 60’s, my favorite decade.

Wind Doesn't Work

For Whole Foods, "environmentalism" means supporting wind power, and saying that their stores are "100% powered by wind". What this likely means is that they buy power from renewable suppliers, paying an additional fee since that sort of energy is more expensive (unless massively subsidized by the government).

Power, however, cannot be economically stored. Thus the real time when you want power is when it is brutally hot outside, which in the Midwest often means little breeze and an overhead haze (which makes solar less economical). This means relying on traditional "base load" resources like coal, nuclear, or natural gas fired fleets.

When I walked into that Whole Foods it was a cold as a meat locker, and the flags hung limply in the breeze. Wind power wasn't supporting Whole Foods when it was most needed; wind power blows whenever the wind blows, unreliably.

My suggestion to environmentalists is to just move their support of causes to the next level; the same way that vegetarians don't eat meat, those that do not support reliable base load power (coal, nuclear, gas) along with the necessary (unsightly) transmission infrastructure to bring the power into your city (since having a plant near the city is usually out of the question due to noise and emissions), should TURN OFF THEIR AIR CONDITIONING AND THEIR ELECTRONIC DEVICES during times of extreme heat. After all, this is what that hated infrastructure is buying - reliability and power during peak loads.

Like those that pine for a diverse society yet move to far flung mono-cultural suburbs, those that value their environmentalist credentials above all should start "living the sweat lifestyle" that they believe in. Turn off that air conditioner, and don't be part of that peak consumption, which in turn justifies the base load power in the first place.

Cross posted at Chicago Boyz

I Always Feel Like...

...somebody's watching me.

Waiting Until It is 95% On Discount

I pined for an Eames chair in this post and am always excited at the prospect of these Herman Miller chairs going on sale. Alas - it isn't 75% or so off which would cause me to swap out my fine functioning chair for this piece of art.

Best White Sox (Regular Season) Game Ever

It was a blazing hot night at US Cellular Field for the White Sox against the hard hitting Texas Rangers.

AJ came up to a big ovation after being snubbed at the All Star game. He also hit well and called a great game for Chris Sale.

Kevin Youkilis hit a two run homer in the first inning to rousing calls of "Youk" from the crowd. He also made some great plays in the outfield. Here you can see his signature stance.

Want to see what the tail end of a career looks like? It looks like this... the coach coming out to talk to Roy Oswalt as he was being absolutely shelled by the White Sox. Literally - it was worse than batting practice for him, and great for us. Bye bye Roy have a good post baseball career. Oh and we will always remember beating you as part of the Astros for the 2005 World Series.

The sign shows the crazy score. I have never seen a game with so many runs scored by the White Sox (in person). Not only that, but Sale was pretty much un-hittable on the mound, even though the White Sox portion of the innings took so long that he probably forgot that he was still pitching.

NEWS ITEM......

Beep bee beep beep beep....

"An Oregon town has reportedly canceled its annual fireworks show out of concern the Fourth of July pyrotechnics will scare sea birds roosting nearby.

Town officials in Depoe Bay have announced the cancellation of the annual pre-Independence Day fireworks show on July 3 following pressure from federal wildlife managers who said the noise disrupts sea birds in the area, the Oregonian reports."

Makes me wonder HOW DO THESE FVCKING BIRDS REACT WHEN THUNDERSTORMS ROLL IN ? ? ? ?

Damn Envirotards. I swear, we are so screwed.

Wolf Point and Urban Traffic Lies

Wolf Point is a famous piece of land that is a penninsula where the Chicago River is on three sides, right in front of the Holiday Inn and adjacent to the Merchandise Mart. Recently the Kennedy's, which own this land, proposed building three giant high rises on the site, as described in this article.

Of all the habitual liars in this world, one of the most odious has to be the "traffic consultant". One of these firms, hired by the Kennedy's, gave a report on the impact of traffic, and per the article:

Residents also suggested the development would further clog already-congested streets and mocked a traffic consultant's conclusion that the project would not significantly worsen traffic.

To some extent, per the picture above, it is impossible to further "worsen" traffic. This is a photo taken during rush hour that is relatively typical; the bridge going north on Orleans (it is one-way) is completely gridlocked leading towards the Wolf Point site and backed up into Wacker drive, blocking both streets. Thus to some extent the consultant is right, because you can't get worse than gridlock.

The groups that will be the most angry by this development are the residents of the condominium called the Riverbend, which you can see adjacent to the Holiday Inn in the picture below. They are screaming because their view down the river will be blocked, so they are packing protest meetings called by the alderman.

Based on past experience, the fact that traffic will move from gridlock to something worse than gridlock (is that possible?) and the residents' protests will fall on deaf ears because the developers typically get their way in this town, and this is especially the case for the well-connected Kennedy's in an old school Democratic "machine" city like Chicago.

The real obstacles are financing. The cost of this development will be astounding, at over $1B, and I expect that most of this will be financed (from some hapless lending institution). Many of those that funded condos and condo hotels went bankrupt and were seized by the Federal Government (i.e. "you" the taxpayer ended up paying for it) during the 2008 crash but apparently someone is lending since the skies are once again full of cranes.

Another interesting element is the fact that Wolf Point was once the proposed site for a 140 story building, per Emporis, the online dictionary of skyscrapers (I highly recommend it, a lot of fun to tool around the site). That was back in the day when the US "reached for the sky" until we were overtaken by other countries, although one of the buildings is 900 feet high (compared to the 1742 feet high proposed skyscraper they were to start building in the 1960's).

Cross posted at Chicago Boyz

"Fronds" Checkbox

As any long term reader of the blog knows, I am a big fan of the "tiki" world, having once even bought a friend of mine a tiki bar (I didn't have any room for one). In selecting an exclusive private retreat per this advertisement, I would expect that you could check "fronds" as a requirement and you'd end up here.

The Re-Organization of the Russian Military

The historical Russian (using the USSR and Czarist Russia as a proxy for Russia) military generally featured the following characteristics:

1. A heavy emphasis on conscripts, with all males who had any sort of connection or means of escaping service, doing so, since the conditions were horribly and brutally bad
2. A "shell" organization of units with only a few active duty soldiers, to be filled out by reservists at mobilization
3. A vast inventory of equipment of various vintages (i.e. old tanks, planes, artillery) that the reservists would use when called up for service
4. In the old "Soviet" military, many of the soldiers were from regions where they did not speak Russian and communication was often poor. This may be partially mitigated today by the fact that many of these former republics of the Soviet Union have now split off into separate countries and are no longer part of the Russian military organization
5. The Russian navy faces particularly difficult conditions because each of the fronts has to operate independently because they are not interconnected, or make vast sea voyages in order to join forces. This contributed to the defeat at Tsushima in 1905, for example

These concepts began to falter after the end of the cold war and the dissolution of the Soviet empire. The lightning US victory against conventional forces in the various Iraq wars and the Russian military's poor performance in the military conflict against Chechnya led the Russians to consider new methodologies.

The inaugural issue of "Modern War", which is a new magazine (to begin in September, 2012) by the publishers of the excellent magazine "Strategy and Tactics", covers the reorganization of the Russian military and is highly recommended for anyone interested in the field. They sent me an issue (since I used to be a subscriber) and I hope it will be on the newsstand soon if you have one near you.

The article is called "Russia's Ongoing Military Reorganization" by Bruce Costello. It describes the following changes to the historical Russian model:

1. Russian forces are to be kept in a state of rapid readiness, fully mobilized, equipped and ready for battle
2. The number of units will correspondingly be significantly reduced
3. Unnecessary equipment and non-fighting organization ranks (officers) will be eliminated (or reduced, in the case of officers)
4. There will be four OSD (Operational Strategic Districts) which will jointly command the land, sea and air units in those districts rather than being independently managed (the rocket forces will remain centrally controlled)
5. The brigade will be the unit size of choice, and reconnaissance will be embedded in the unit along with sufficient communication gear to meet the mission
6. The Russians are moving to purchase foreign arms where needed, such as a French amphibious ship, a dramatic departure from former practice
7. There is to be more of an emphasis on professional troops rather than conscripts. There are various sources on the effectiveness of this move from a conscript army to a professional army, but apparently the goal is to have 1/3 of the troops as conscripts (rotating out every 12 months) with the remaining 2/3 professional and long serving soldiers.

As a keen student of military history it is very odd seeing Russia moving to a semi-professional army staffed in a "ready" mode. It also is unusual that they are considering buying foreign arms since the Soviet Union was able to manufacture pretty much everything at the height of the USSR (although the former Czarist Russians and inter-war USSR did purchase foreign equipment, particularly for ideas on home grown designs). Times change, and these changes are reaching even historically consistent organizations such as the Russian military. It is difficult for me to remain neutral on these changes if they make the Russian military more effective; the Russian military has historically not been deployed in alignment with the interests of the US or the West. Note their current backing of odious Assad in Syria, a reaction to their client Gaddafi meeting his end thanks in part by the backing of NATO and their air and sea assets.

Cross posted at Chicago Boyz

Monday Morning Blues

Paul Williams "Still Alive" Movie

I recently saw the movie "Paul Williams - Still Alive" about the 70's songwriter and movie / TV star Paul Williams at the Gene Siskel Film Center in Chicago. The photo below shows Paul Williams, on the right, who is 71 years old and looking great (all things considered, as you'll see in the movie), along with the director Stephen Kessler in the middle. The guy on the left is from Ain't It Cool News. After the movie the three of them sat and Paul answered questions from the audience in a polite, patient, and very funny manner.

I knew hardly anything about Paul Williams going into the movie, because I didn't stay up late enough to see the Johnny Carson show in the 70's although I certainly recognized him. He wrote many of the hugest hits of the era, including "Evergreen", and the Rainbow song from the Muppet movie, and songs for the Carpenters and on his own.

The movie inserts the filmmaker into the film as he pesters Paul and follows him around for almost 5 years. Notably he follows him to the Philippines in an area that is noted for civil unrest where Paul Williams plays to an improbably large arena full of adoring fans - they know all his songs through karaoke, I guess.



The movie's arc is basically that Paul Williams had a giant career as a singer, as a songwriter, and as an actor, until he almost went under due to drug addiction and booze in the 1980's. He got his life together, became a registered substance abuse counselor and speaker on the topic, and is happier today than he was at the height of his fame.



There's a bunch of great Paul Williams stuff out on the web like this I recommend that you go out and check it out - you will have a laugh. And if this can be believed... there is a report that Paul Williams wrote a couple of songs for the new Daft Punk album.

I highly recommend that you go out and see this movie when it comes to a town near you. It is one of the best films that I have seen in a while.

My First Colonoscopy

This is as close to crap blogging as I will get.



On Monday afternoon ol' G will be getting the spinster cam treatment. I will be on a liquid diet as of noon today. Then at 3pm I begin to drink a fluid and eat some pills that may launch me into the ceiling of the WC.

UPDATE: Stopped eating solids at 11am. Swallowed four Dulcolax pills at 2pm. An hour later uncontrollable farting commenced, Checked with the University Of Chicago seismic lab and they recorded a disturbance measuring .005 of the Richter scale at approx. 3:23pm.

UPDATE: This is nothing more than overdosing on laxatives. I mixed 4oz. of Miralax powder into a quart of gatorade. At 3pm I began drinking an 8oz glass every fifteen minutes for an hour and it didn't taste bad at all. Then nothing. At 6:15pm gut rumbles began. My first trip to the WC was uneventful. There has got to be more to it than this.

UPDATE: 745pm. Ever make a roux? I have. A roux is the beginning of an excellent gumbo where equal parts flour and olive oil are stirred in a medium warm dutch oven and stirred patiently for over 45 minutes until it becomes a rich, chocolate brown. So far I have seen three bowls of roux. This is nothing like what Billy Connolly describes in the video above. I am going to bed. Tomorrow when I awake there is another quart of spiked gatorade that needs to be chugged.

UPDATE: Monday morning. All went well last night, waking up to squirt only once. Drank the final quart of spiked gatorade. So far this experience has been nothing like the colon blow horror stories. This afternoon: RectumCam.

UPDATE: Tuedsay morning. It's as if nothing unusual happened, horror stories be damned. While sedated I awoke enough to feel some slight discomfort but that was all. They searched, discovered and removed six polyps. These can become cancerous. This is why it's a good idea to make time for a SpincterScope exam, I highly endorse this procedure.