Wish I could have a Viking funeral where they lay my lifeless body in my boat over a high pile of dry twigs and start the motor. As the boat travels out into a Lake Michigan sunset with the steering wheel locked an archer would send a flaming arrow into the pile of twigs while the boat is about 50 yards offshore igniting it and reducing my remains into a pile of jumbo perch food. But that probably will not happen thanks to the EPA and Homeland Security.
This came to mind when I read today that Chicago Cub third baseman Ron Santo will have his ashes spread about the third base area at Wrigley Field.
Santo was a fine player and I say that being a White Sox fan (for the record Ron also played for the White Sox). The man had lost some of his class in his later years as a broadcaster because he was constantly whining that he was not in the hall of fame at Cooperstown. Ron may have been a very good player but he wasn’t a great among greats.
Being in any sports hall of fame is determined by many different aspects, such as national popularity, longevity, statistics and relationships with the both the east coast sports media elite, other players and managers. That was Ron’s problem. As a player he often snubbed the media and had a nasty attitude toward other players.
For instance:
Jul 8, 1969 - With 3 runs in the 9th inning‚ the Mets beat the Cubs 4-3‚ cutting Chicago's lead in the NL East to 4 games. Ron Santo rips into CF Don Young for two misplays in the OF. Santo will apologize tomorrow for criticizing Young‚ who had left early and didn't take the team bus. Santo will get booed in his first game back at Wrigley.
Jul 14, 1969 - At Wrigley‚ the Cubs top the Mets 1-0 to give Bill Hands (11-7) the win over Tom Seaver (14-4). Billy Williams singles home the winner‚ boosting the Cubs lead to 5 1/2 games. After the last out‚ Ron Santo jumps up and clicks his heels‚ igniting a roar from the crowd. The Mets think it's bush.
BTW, 1969 was the year the Cubs blew a nine game lead in late August and is a thorn in every Cub fan's undies, the amazin' Mets went on to win the pennant and the World Series.
So fans can now remember Ron Santo whenever a player slides into a pile of his ashen remnants at third base. And any player near that area will get a snoot full of Ron but will never know which body part it came from.
RIP, Mr. Santo. Sure hope the wind is blowing out the day they toss your ashes.
I smell another curse coming on.
3 comments:
I also shall be cremated, hopefully. My theory is that any cemetery will eventually have a condo complex or mall built on top of it after it is totally grown over, with no loved ones left to take care of the graves. Just wasted real estate imho.
It is OK to have that request to be cremated in your will, but it really is up to whoever is left behind to actually do what you ask. You just have to hope they come through for you.
It doesn't matter to me, I'll be dead and it's their money. Traditional funerals cost too damn much.
This reminds me of the story of two old cusses in Canada which didn't exactly get along. One passed away and the day they spread his ashes under his domicile, as per his wishes, the other went over after the guests had left and fired up his leaf blower and blew the ashes out into the yard.
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