Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Wrigley Field Rooftop Seats

Worst Seats In The House

No fan of the Chicago Cubs am I. Wrigley Field? No big whup. Been there. It’s a urine soaked dump loaded with more drunks than a Soldier Field parking lot on an autumn Sunday.

So much about the Cubs and their fans amuse me to no end. To me, those rooftop bleachers across the street from the park are the biggest hoax in sports.

That’s why THIS caught my eye.

Fans can watch the Cubs v. Yankees from a rooftop seat for half price. That’s $125 for seats usually selling for $275. For what?

From the page (emphasis mine):

You sit in the bleachers, (no, not the real bleachers) watching the Cubs-Yankees face off, hoist a beer to your friends, and exclaim this is the best seat in house. Or rather, on the house. This is your chance to watch the Cubs battle in Wrigley from excellent rooftop seats along Sheffield Avenue.

If you haven’t watched a game from a roof deck, you haven’t experienced a crucial, authentic Chicago experience. Call it a Bucket List entry: watching the game atop an endorsed rooftop with unobstructed views, easy bathroom access, and all you can eat and drink. There are limited seats for each, so call early.

Rooftop access starts one full hour before the game. Help yourself to as much as you can eat and drink: pizza, burgers, dogs, Italian beef, cookies, brownies, ice cream and more. When you grab this daily deal you grab yourself the best seat on the house.

One may as well watch a baseball game from the Goodyear fvcking blimp at 2,000 feet.

I might be willing to sit in those rooftop seats under certain circumstances. If it were free and they provided limo transportation to and from, served Bombay Sapphire martinis with prime porterhouse steaks and offered me the opportunity to snort coke off a stripper's tits.

It appears that Cub fans are finally losing their enthusiasm for losing judging by this incredible offer. The bloom is off the Wrigley rose. The honeymoon for new owner Ricketts is officially over. But enough of the cliches.

The joke is on the fans.


Dan from Madison said...

I wonder - do the Flubs get a cut of the gate at the rooftop facilities? What ever happened to the screen they put up in the outfield a few years ago?

Gerry from Valpo said...

The team owners and rooftop owners came to an agreement in 2004.

They came to a 20 year agreement to pay the team $15 -$20 per person sitting on a roof with a shitty view eating bad all-you-can food and drinking corn water.

Here's the source:

I would much rather tailgate in the Comiskey parking lot eating decent grilled food and drinking primo cocktails before watching some quality baseball IN THE DAMN STADIUM.

Dan from Madison said...

I am sure the only edible thing MIGHT be a brat at those rooftop seats. And great to wash it down with a cornwater ($10 I assume).

Trooper York said...

On the other hand the guys in the old Bronx House of Dentention got a great view of the field in the Old Yankee staduim.

But you had to earn those seats.

Gerry from Valpo said...

What'll it be for you Trooper, Yankees or Mets?

Tom Charvat said...

Love this piece Jerry, I'm passing to all my Sox friends!

Trooper York said...

Dude don't insult me. Only losers root for the Mets.

You might as well hit your weiner with a hammer.

I mean it's ok if you hit the congressman with a hammer...I mean your own personal weiner.

Trooper York said...

Rooting for the Mets is like hiring Casey Anthony as a babysitter.

Trooper York said...

Rooting for the Mets is like telling your teenage daughter...sure you should friend the Congressman on facebook. What's the diff?