Road Trip - Canada Part 3

Part 1 Part 2

Sorry Canada, you're nothing better than a third world country. There. I said it.


Not being much of a world traveler as Carl or Dan, the difference between the USA and Canada is immediately noticeable on a road tip. Eliminating Montreal, Toronto and Vancouver all that’s left is wilderness and natural mineral resources.

Once across the border the road turns grainy and rough. The town of Rainy River Ont. appears to be a depressed area when the only good looking buildings are the Ontario Liquor Control Board (state controlled booze) and the curling rink.


We cross at Baudette MN because International Falls is a cluster fvck of confusion and long delays. Crossing there reminds me of Tijuana. Customs agents and immigration officials on both sides are bigger asswipes than conservation officers. They treat everybody equally. Like crap.

The 14 hour drive we take has a lot of sightseeing opportunities as we pass by (we only stop to take a pee or buy fuel and on the way up some guys prefer an overnight stay in Grand Rapids) so I try to keep the camera ready. The best part is the last 1/3 north of Deer River MN. This time we saw more deer than ever on that stretch and they were hard to spot since for some reason they were standing parallel to the road and, at times, right on the shoulder. Very hard to spot.

What I like about passing thru Wisco and Minn. are the obligatory huge fiberglass figures tht dot the landscape. It could be a 40’ tall mouse eating cheese, a gigantic orange moose or in the case of Baudette MN, a giant walleye. I guess the intent is to get travelers to stop for a photo and possibly spend a few bucks.

One of my favorite spots is Ted’s between Bergland and Morson Ont. Not much different from a redneck junk yard in the southern suburbs of Chicago. Love that sign and always look out for it on the trip to make sure Ted is still alive and collecting crap.


Ojibwe Indians are what Canadians call part of the ‘First Nation’. That’s a Canadian PC term for their dwindling Indians tribes. We know one Ojibwe very well. His name is Lenny and works at the resort. Lenny is a very dedicated hard working quiet guy and we hired him as a fishing guide a few times years ago. He remembers us because we tip him well and treat him as one of us. He taught us a lot about walleye fishing.

In Canada they have reservations just as they do in the USA. Here’s the local tribe sign. Isn’t that a phrase used in an old Three Stooges short?


We were told a few years back that the local Ojibwe were given housing courtesy of the taxpaying Canadians. But the Ojibwe weren’t happy. Uh uh. Since the homes were built inland and they historically lived on the shores of LOTW they demanded newer homes be built on the water. The government surrendered and built them all new homes on the water.


Along the way these are often seen. No, that is not a Gitmo detention center for radical Islamists. But close. That is a roadside garbage protection facility. It protects the garbage from black bears who would rip those trash bags to shreds IF they could get at them.


No way would I ever drive 14 hours to ice fish. I may be crazy but not stoopid.