Wednesday, May 18, 2011

NFL Helmet Designs

Since the players and owners seem hopelessly stuck in their negotiations, the press really doesn't have much to write about wrt the NFL. In this vein, we get this article from ESPN ranking the helmets of the NFL.

I remember when I was a little kid and was getting my first taste of football. The helmets/logos were the first thing that attracted me to the sport. I utterly despise the helmets that my beloved Illini currently wear:

So f*cking ugly.
Lets go back to this:

Or better yet, this - really old school:

But I digress.

Remember the old Houston Oiler Oil Derrick helmets? Now THAT was a helmet.

As usual, the ESPN writers in the article above have everything wrong, so let me tell you who has good helmets and who has crappy ones. I will go by division, and rank them on a scale of 1 to 10.

AFC East:
Patriots - 4. The new patsy logo isn't bad, but there is too much silver in it. The old Patriot helmet with the guy on it Steve Grogan style was one of the best helmets ever, and scores a ten.
Dolphins - 8. Great action, and relatively unchanged for a long time.
Jests - 7. Much better now that they have gone back to their historical helmet.
Bills - 6. Pretty cluttered, but still good action. The old Bills helmets like OJ wore with the Buffalo grazing on the white background were awesome and score a 9.

AFC North:
Steelers - 4. I never liked this logo. Others will argue with me but I never liked this logo, and to boot it is only on one side of the helmet. Plus I hate the Steelers.
Ravens - 6. A bit cartoony, but still OK looking.
Browns - 8. Plain old orange. Love the classics.
Bengals - 1. What a disaster of a franchise and uniform.

AFC South:
Colts - 8. Another helmet basically unchanged from the Baltimore days. I love it. Very bold and instantly recognizable.
Jags - 3. Looks like total crap on TV.
Texans - 6. I used to hate this one but I am learing to like it. Too many curves in it though.
Titans - 3. Hate this one. They should just have stuck to being the Oilers.

AFC West:
Chargers - 5. I would like it more if they went back to their original color scheme.
Raiders - 8. Great helmet, and unchanged mostly. Even Al Davis can't screw that one up.
Broncos - 3. Terrible. You can hardly tell it is a horse on there. Elway's helmets sucked too with the big D on there. They need a do-over.
Chiefs - 9. Mostly unchanged over time, a nice logo with the beautiful red field.

NFC North:
Packers - 1. I hate the Packers.
Bears - 3. I never could understand why they didn't put an actual Bear on the side of the helmet. I know the C is historical, but it never did much for me.
Lions - 1. They just cannot get a nice lion helmet together. Scrap the silver and blue.
Queens - 8. I have always loved that helmet, although I have always hated the team.

NFC East:
Cowboys - 7. They really can't change their helmet, and if they did I am sure their fans would go ballistic.
Giants - 7. MUCH better since they went from the word GIANTS on the helmet to the NY old school.
Redskins - 10. My perfect NFL helmet with the exact combo I want of historical nod plus modern design. Although the old Redskin spear helmets were top notch too.
Eagles - 5. I know they could do better, but they have to keep somewhat historical.

NFC South:
Falcons - 4. Too much action with their new Falcon logo. The one in the previous generation gets a 7 from me.
Saints - 6. Fleur looks OK. What else would you really put on there?
Bucs - 2. Looks like a third grader designed that one.
Panthers - 2. See Bucs.

NFC West:
Rams - 8. I have always loved the Rams helmets too and I used to be a diehard Ram hater.
49ers - 8. They have maintained that nice SF logo and it looks great with the gold and red.
Cardinals - 10. I don't know what it is, I have always loved the Cardinal logo with the white helmet. They have modernized the Cardinal itself a bit which I don't like but so it goes.
Sea Chickens - 0. Forever and always, the worst helmet in all of professional football.

I am sure our resident graphic artist will have some good food for thought on this post.


Gerry from Valpo said...

Outstanding post!

I will take up the challenge.

But not in the comments section and not today.

It does give me inspiration for a future rant.

Maybe tomorrow.

Dan from Madison said...

I will admit that this was partially bait for you, our resident graphic artist. Also, upon re-reading my post I am partial to helmets that are white with BOLD logos, or all one color with a bold logo like KC. Looking forward to your post on the subject which will be WAY better than mine.

Mark said...

Packers - 1. I hate the Packers.

Should have seen that coming... heh

Dan from Madison said...

pretty hard to do an impartial review of that particular helmet