Wednesday, August 17, 2005

IKEA

It cracked me up when Carl posted about IKEA vs. the IAEA. There is no doubt that IKEA could do a better job in world affairs than most any of the other corrupt agencies. I had firsthand witness of this last Sunday. On the way back from my vacation for the past few years we have stopped at the gigantic IKEA store just outside of Woodfield Mall in suburban Chicago. The photo you see here is taken from above the store, courtesy of Google Earth.

For those not familiar, IKEA is a beautiful marketing concept - the short version: cheap Chinese shit marketed under a Swedish name. Really. That is what it is. Granted the stuff they have looks nice, but it is all made in China.

We arrived at the store about 10:30 am Sunday. We stopped to go to the bathroom and I got done first as usual. I sat by the entrance waiting for my wife and kids to get done and decided to count the people coming in. It averaged about 40 people per minute! I knew this was not good. Fortunately the store is huge. Still, after about 45 minutes of shopping, you could hardly push a cart through the place it was so packed. There are some pretty good deals to be had I must admit - we replaced all of our every day dishes for $50 - that is for 12 settings! We also bought a bunch of other stuff we needed, but now it was time to leave.

The whole parking lot was full - and I mean every single spot - and traffic was backing up out of the IKEA store into the side streets that border Woodfield Mall. It was total and complete mayhem. Honestly, it made city of Chicago traffic seem normal (which it is definitely not). Anyway, after bullying my way through the lot I picked up the cargo, kids and wife and got the hell out of there. Unbelievable. I am on Carl's side - IKEA, not IAEA.

I wonder if we could get IKEA to bury the nuclear reactors that Iran is working on with furniture or flooring or flatware - they could even use Air Force planes if they wanted. Just fill up the C-130's, send them with fighter escorts to Iran and put the whole damn place under 12 feet of home furnishings.

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